What does resilience look like? It’s that process of how we deal with difficult situations or adversity. Life is full of difficulty, such as experiencing loss, stress, anxiety, depression, fear, just to name a few. On the other hand, life also can bring about an abundance of joy, determination, excitement, and special memories to cherish. There is really no escaping the ever-changing flow of the good and the bad. Resilience is something that marks how we respond to these ever-changing situations, especially after experiencing something that emotionally paralyzes us, not knowing how to react. Being resilient does not prevent adversity or difficult situations. It is rather an approach with how we rise above the challenges we face.

So how can we help teens build resiliency?

• Keep it positive. Help youth shape a positive mindset by challenging them to think in positive directions. Encourage them to seek positive people as well.
• Encourage youth to help others. Help youth determine how they can lend a helping hand for others. This ultimately makes them feel good also.
• Coach them to increase self-awareness. Help youth to keep a healthy self-check by teaching them to identify and become aware of needs and emotions. This is a time to encourage them to become aware vs dwelling.
• Encourage self-discipline. Help youth establish healthy routines and schedules.
• Discuss short term and long-term goals. Listen to youth and also allow them to identify goals that can give them a sense of accomplishments and purpose.
• Promote courage and a sense of self growth. Help youth build confidence by providing positive and constructive feedback as well as a sense of direction for how to face   challenges.
• Accept change. Help youth realize they cannot always control situations and that adversity is temporary. Help youth identify personal strengths they possess to address  challenges as well as identify areas of difficulty in themselves in which they can seek assistance.
• Identify positive support. Encourage youth that utilizing positive support is a strength and become aware of negative support as well.

So how can teens put it into practice?

• Schedule a daily time to journal. Focus on three good things that have happened to you for the day.
• Give it a title. Explain how and why the situation happened and identify what made it a positive event.
• Your feelings are important. Describe how those positive events made you feel.
• Keep up the good work! Daily journaling helps you keep a record of those positive events so you can reflect on those experiences.

Take a moment and write three things you can add to your list right now. Jot down some ideas to help get you started!

Source: In the Moment: Resiliency tip sheet. For the pdf download, go online here

Authors: Tessa Hobbs-Curley and Sheri Merry, Illinois Extension Educators